Beware: The other man in your wife’s life

Is your wife spending too much time pursuing that MBA degree? Has she suddenly changed her wardrobe? 

Does she seem to be closer to her male friends than she is to you? Has she become distant, ignores you and resists your sexual overtures?

If any of your answers to these questions are yes, then there is a high likelihood that there is another man in your woman’s life, a survey commissioned by The Standard on Sunday reveals.

The survey, conducted by Infotrak Research and Consulting shows a growing number of women, driven by fears within their marriages, conflicts with their spouses, lack of sexual satisfaction, a need for extra money, revenge as well as peer pressure, end up in the arms of the other man.

“As husbands strive to look for resources and make investments they ignore the emotional needs of their wives,” Nairobi based sociologist Loice Okello told The Standard on Sunday.

Ms Okello says a lack of communication on emotional and sexual matters is the leading reason why women would seek solace in the arms of another man.

“Too much pressure makes them grow apart. People don’t communicate with each other on emotional and sexual needs.”

Okello says in most cases, the women end up dealing with a younger man.

“They get what they are lacking from a younger man, or a workmate. Generally from people over whom they have authority like younger academic aides or drivers,” the sociologist says.

The Infotrak survey shows that although infidelity is highly scorned upon, it is more discreet among women but men open up to tell their stories.

“For some men, it is considered as some sort of badge of honour among peers. They will openly talk about it. But women will not reveal it even to their closest of confidants,” George Ouko, the Catholic University of Eastern Africa psychologist, said.

Standard